Where's My Head At?!
when the most horrendous things have already happened...every bit more is simply noise.
Hi, my name is Adele, I am me, I am unique, I am individual and I decide to remain true to my own ethics of 'do no harm' and 'never lie'...be authentic always.
i am re-growing my feathers lost, I am re-centuring, finding the me that was almost destroyed....but I survived and Adele now has nothing to fear. No longer shall Adele be controlled, bullied, silenced, live in fear, erased. I am here and here to stay.
My art has been following this realisation, this painful journey. Now I realise no one individual, no act of hatred, cruelty or harm will penetrate now...I fly above it all...as the swallows currently dip and dive above my head, as I write in my garden.
whatever is ahead of me, it is all periphery, it does not take Adele...the soul, the earthy, connected, sensual, giving Adele.
Material items matter not to the soul, they matter not to me. Me and my art exist, as one...forever connected and combined. That is why my art is accepted and connects with so many. It is always me...on canvas, wood, ceramic or textile.
A recent cruel 'attack' to try and 'break' me has not achieved the deprived intention. I am still here and guess what....I will be allowing those experiences to flow through my arm, into my hand and into my art. Something hate filled and negative will become real, genuine, beautiful art. So thank you for the 'raw' material for me to own and remould into good!
As I currently continue my journey to adapt to my lifechanging injuries, I am having to find new ways to create my art. Will I achieve this? Damn right I will...even if it is limited in volume, not providing any financial security; these things do not matter. What is most vital to me is that Adele exists, in her purest, kindest, authentic way...to be me. MY art brings joy to many and that in itself is justifying enough.
Recently I came across a homeless woman, of about my age. This amazing woman, surrounded by her limited possessions others would discard as scrap, was most concerned about her appearance and smell....that touched my soul.
I have spent quite a bit of time with this amazing woman. I have helped practically by helping her hold onto her dignity (in her eyes only). I have obviously provided food and other survival necessities, foregoing my own needs and limited resources, lets face it...in comparison my roof and home situation was far beyond hers...even though I never shared with her the horrors of my recent life. The greatest gift I was able to give was twofold...I created a textile dandelion for her...with both yellow petals and the seedhead...to meet her love of yellow and allow her a dandelion clock to wish upon. the other was to hold her, hold her hand, hug her, allow her to cry. She longed for touch, human contact and that was something that cost me nothing. As passing people looked in disdain and repulsion...I held her, her spirit, her strength...her.
In some ways it mirrors my own battle so much. Without her being aware, she was reaching inside of my heart, showing me the path to follow. To hold on to what is important.
Here is where I want to connect you to art,,,my art at least. Art is about a connection, whether that be within yourself, to nature, to another or others...it is a connection to something. To connect is to exist, to exist is to have value, to have value is to have purpose, to have purpose is to have life...
I am working on new art, some of which has already been exhibited in Halifax and greatly received...I shall be creating new, evolved art for you to continue this journey with me. Because, yes, unfortunately the evil around my neck continues to try and cause pain and destruction but you may now realise, I shall fly way above these feeble attempts at pain and control. I shall continue to help others, I will continue to grow feathers, I will learn to fly again and once I take flight...watch me soar....
Consider your own circle, your own circumstances...are they healthy for you? If not, why do they have the luxury of sharing your love, your time, your thoughts, your soul? Are you not worth more than this??
If you love art or create art, ask yourself...does it say something? Is there a piece of you, the deepest you, in it? How is it authentically you?
I thank every one of you have been of such amazing support, in helping to keep me afloat when all seems too much, when the waves were too high, there power too much to swim through, too long to hold my breath..too painful and cruel to see beyond. I thank you from the centre of my heart...you have and continue to help me keep going...without judgement and with simple, pure light that is kindness and understanding.
Onwards we go....